I try to be patient. It is hard, but I try. But the other day I heard this song on the radio. I must say my tear ducts in general aren't over flowing, but they are filled with dust either. As I was listening to this, I couldn't help but think about my child(ren) out there that are not with me. I did start crying. I did get a lump in my throat and was missing my little one(s). The sentence that God used last October came to mind, "If you are called to adopt, your child is out there not getting the love and care that they could be getting if they were with you." This of course is different as a natural pregnancy, you know where your child is. Thanks to this book you know what is going on during pregnancy. We are only into month 5 of our adoption, but there is a strong chance the newest member(s) to our family is in this world. They are active, breathing, learning, but not being physically loved on by their mommy, daddy and brothers. I really miss them as crazy at that sounds. I have not met them, but I love them, I pray for them, my heart aches that I am not with them. There is no definite date at this time and I can't imagine how much more I will miss them once I actually see their faces and we are matched.
It seems like each day that there are changes in our adoption plan. That is not uncommon, but it is not welcome either. As I listen to others about their adoption there is one common denominator, no story is the same. God is making our story a special one as well. We do trust that his timing is best and our prayer is for patience.
PS: I know the song "Smile" by Chris Rice is about seeing Jesus for the first time, but I could help of thinking about my present circumstance. Although I can't wait for that day either!!